My Love Hate Relationship with Food

Food is not evil. Food is not the enemy. Food is Fuel. So how come I often find myself dreading the chore of meal planning and meal making?

Lately, it is because food has no joy for me anymore. No flavor. I find myself craving something super sweet or super salty and still not satisfied. I find myself eating without paying attention to flavor. Is that because I can't identify the flavor? Or is it because eating has become so mindless that I simply don't register the flavors?

I have fallen off the wagon. I have been eating Gluten and Dairy with abandon and this has been a tough allergy season. I have justified that many people are complaining about the allergens this season, but I know that I sneeze withing 20-30 minutes of eating gluten. My issue is that Gluten Free Bagels are awful. I love Bagels. And so does Sampson. There is no substitute. I need to get my life in order and get my body back on track. 

I am turning 40 in 109 days. I am not dreading 40. I am embracing the freedom that my life has and is continuing to become. As we women age society discounts us more, and expects less from us. We get marginalized and in that marginalization is the opportunity to live life. I won't set some lofty goal that I will be in the best shape of my life by my 40th birthday, because it simply isn't possible. However, I plan on spending the next 109 days working toward a healthy, sustainable life style. One where I have enough energy to get through my to do list (even if that means shrinking it to fit on a post it note), and I feel good in my clothes and my skin. 

I know that I haven't been getting my vitamins and minerals. So I am starting with some Smoothies. I love smoothies. I'll likely convert to porridge as the weather cools down, but for now I am going to enjoy my smoothies. Today is GreenaColada: Greens (Spinach), Pineapple (canned in juice), coconut milk (hey it is what I had on hand) and a dash of hemp seeds for some healthy fats.

I have no idea what tomorrow will bring, but I know I'll have plenty of opportunities to make healthy choices. I just wish we had an affordable salad place (Like Half Moon Salads) here. I despise paying $10-$12 for a mediocre and tasteless salad. I know I could make my own.... but that would mean dealing with the disaster that my kids keep leaving in the kitchen.