Time Management Tuesday

Isn't it ironic that my post for Time Management Tuesday is late because of poor time management? 

Better late than never. 

In last Tuesday's post I had mentioned that I needed to put up my curtain rods, and that I could make the task more manageable by putting up one pair a day. Well here I sit in the middle of a major snow storm and I still don't have my insulated curtains up. 

It is a fairly easy task. They are the cheapo white ones that install with hammer and finishing nails. 

I have put up curtain rods, several in the house I shared with the X for 15 years. 

So why can't I bring myself to tackle this task?

There are MANY reasons:

The clutter and chaos of the space is overwhelming and I feel like I CANNOT tackle it. 

I do not like the curtain rods. They are the cheap white metal ones and I just don't care for them. They WILL show (and not just when my curtains are open) all the time because I have grommetted curtains. I also don't really care for the curtains that I have. I don't mean to sound ungrateful for either the curtains or the curtain rods (my mother purchased both for me because I could not afford them myself). But here is my dilemma, I am tired of having to make do, just because. So instead of hating the curtains that my mother was generous enough to purchase for me, I am going to use them to help save on my energy costs and figure out WHAT it is I WANT. Then I am going to price out what I want and start saving to HAVE what I WANT. 

Lastly, and most importantly is my fear of failure. I have spent my whole life being told I am not particularly good at anything (except that I would make a good lawyer, hence my decision to become a lawyer AND my failure to do so). I lived for 17+ years with someone who "playfully picked" at everything I did, pointing out all of the flaws and failures. 

Yet, if I don't TRY then I didn't fail, I simply didn't do and I can come up with a million reasons  excuses why.

I am working to acknowledge my fear of failure and even to retrain my brain to think of failure as ONLY that which I do not try.

For this upcoming week I am going to tackle 3 daily tasks that I believe will help make my life better AND improve my time management.

I HATE walking into a kitchen with dirty dishes. So to try to keep the dirty dishes at a minimum I will wash 1 load of dishes a day.

Cat litter. I clean the boxes, put fresh litter in and then commit to cleaning them daily, and the I don't. So today I will clean the cat litter boxes (entirely) and refill them with clean litter, then before bed I will scoop them and first thing in the morning I will scoop them again. 

Pick it up and put it away. Every time I walk out of a room I will remove one item that does not belong in that room and put it away. Away might be a space in another room, a storage box in the attic, the recycle bin, the trash or a staging area to list it on one of the multiple Facebook sites I am using to declutter my life. 

BUDGET is Not a 4 Letter Word * Monday Money Matters

Continuing with the daily themes I set up last week, today we talk about Money Matters. Specifically we talk about Budgets. Many people view Budgets or Budgeting as a bad thing. It has taken on the same kind of negative and limited meaning as the word Diet. 

Budgeting is not a bad thing, and it doesn't mean to have limited funds. Instead is it simply an allocation of the funds you have to the liabilities you have. If you are in a position where this leaves you with excess funds it is a way to let you know and track those excess funds so you can plan for them as you will. 

In Blog Posts and the media Budget has only been used to imply poor or lack of funds. 

DIY on a Budget
Budget Kitchen Makeover
30 Things You Can Cut From Your Budget to Save $1000 this month

Who else has opened some of these blogs, posts or articles claiming to be frugal and talking about limited budgets only to read them and find out that someone else's limited budget is Champagne and Caviar to your Beer and Bratwurst?

That is because what constitutes a limited budget is determined by the income one has coming in and the debts one has going out.

When I first became a mother and a wife I learned quickly that we did not have enough money coming in to spend willy nilly. I would set up budgets and I would always forget about something (usually annual costs like vehicle renewals, or birthday/holiday gift money) and my budget was constantly being busted. 

I also blew my budget because I was afraid to have "that" conversation with my X. I was afraid if I told him there wasn't enough money for him to do the fun things he wanted to do, and to buy himself the things he wanted then he would leave, and I would be alone. So instead I used credit cards. I always figured our financial situation was temporary and that we would have increases in our income that would allow me to pay off our debt and get ahead. Yet somehow I just kept increasing our debt and the same amount of money was deposited into our account each pay period (no matter what the X's actual income was).

I used to pride myself on being able to keep the grocery bill low and still have tasty and creative meals (and even have enough left over to throw a casual dinner party every week). Those meals were mostly based on grains (rice and pasta) and now those are not options for me. 

I also went through a very dark time where I resented the fact that I worked so hard and didn't get to spend a dime on myself or as I wanted (it was also when I realized just how much money the X had kept out of each paycheck for himself) and I spent money on my kids to get them things they wanted (not things they needed) to try to fix the situation.
So the first step in my financial freedom is accountability. The $30k in credit card debt is my sole responsibility. I had an obligation to tell the X "No we cannot afford that and you need to start putting MORE of you paycheck into this family and this household". 

When I would create a budget I would typically only track our fixed expenses (that which occurred regularly and month to month). This meant I was always caught off guard and without means when a birthday (my kiddos or their friends) or a holiday came up, I was also without means to pay for things like clothing, shoes, and haircuts. This just wasn't in my budget. 

For a while I would read blogs (and now pins) about saving money and slashing one's budget and it would talk about giving up things like the $5/day Starbucks, eating out regularly, extras on the fancy cell phone, keeping the car a few years more.... all things that I really couldn't do. That isn't to say there are not areas in my budget that I cannot trim the fat, there are. For MOST people there is always one or two indulgences they have that they could give up to get out of debt faster (but only if they wanted to).

However, before I can talk about trimming my budget I need to establish a budget that works. 

I have found that the key to that is tracking. I'll start with what I believe to be my budget and include all the categories I can think of, and then keep track of it over the next few months (in reality one should always be monitoring and adjusting ones budget) so that I can have a realistic budget based on the income I have, not my potential income. 

Housing - Most everyone has a housing cost. Mine is a rent
$575.00
This is a fixed number.

Energy - In this area my Electric and Gas are one company (RG&E) and one bill this is a fluctuating cost. I could request a "budget bill", but this would cost me MORE money over the next three years. You see there was an obscene amount of energy usage in this property before I moved in, and budget bills take the last year of usage and then divide it by 12 months so you have a predictable bill each month. If your usage decreases at the end of the 12 months they will credit you the difference and adjust your budget bill amount. If it increases so will the budget bill. The issue that I currently have with RG&E is my usage is less than 1/3 the typical usage of the last three years so they throw out my meter reads an estimate my usage greater than it is. I have gone round and round with RG&E and I cannot get this corrected (even with having them come out and read - they throw out their actual reads because it doesn't track with their system). If my calculations are correct my energy usage is typically $50-$80 per month (gas and electric) and in a cold winter might go as high as $100 in the month. So a safe budget number for my RG&E would be $100, then the money left over at the end of the month could be used for an energy improvement in the home. 
$100

Water - I used to forget this for years, because we only got billed once every quarter. I eventually started factoring it into my budget but when the money wasn't there for other things (like food) I would use the $10/month I allotted for the water bill for that. Fortunately, water is part of my rent and I don't have to think about it here. 

Refuse collection - Also part of my rent.

Car Insurance - Right now I do not have a vehicle, so I do not have car insurance payments. I am working on getting a car so I will have insurance payments again. I am planning to pay my first 6 months or a year in a lump sum (for the extra savings) but I will need to then put the equivalent amount aside every month so that when it comes due again I have the money for that purpose. When I last got a quote I was looking at $60 per month so I'll budget a little bit more than that to be safe.
$75

Registration - This will be a one time lump sum due every two years. I believe it is $75 every two years but this is one of those numbers I'll need to adjust once I know what it is. That would mean that I would need to allocated $40 per year and $4 per month. 

Inspection - This is an annual fee and I believe it is $50, again a number I'll update when I can confirm. Over the course of a year it would require $5 per month.
$5 

Oil Changes - I am not a change your oil every three months or 3000 miles. I know that most vehicles can go longer. If I use an oil change company it has cost me in the past (and this number will constantly increase) $60. If I figure on changing my oil every 3 months just to be safe that would be 4 oil changes a year and cost me $240 a year or $24 per month (yes all of my math is based on the even 10 not the 12, I have learned it is better to overestimate and have left over than to estimate to the penny).
$24

Maintenance (aka Peter) - This is another category I never had in any of my budgets, or if I did I would rob from to pay "Paul". I have never in my life had a new car, so I cannot count on warrantied repairs and scheduled maintenance. Instead I am looking at purchasing a 2003 Chevy Tracker. This vehicle is in good condition and has been properly maintained, but that doesn't mean that it won't need repair. One of the things I plan to do is take it to my mechanic and ask him what he sees as potential repairs and needed replacements in the next year.  Because of the age of the car and the fact I am buying it outright I won't have a payment on it. Instead I am going to allocate $100 each month to maintenance an repairs - until I have $2000 set aside in a vehicle emergency fund. 
$100

Total for Vehicle Maintenance -  
$135

Gas/Tolls - With Lulu training in Bville I NEED to account for 2 tanks of gas per week. One for the trips out and back to Bville and then one for the rest of my week. I am guessing that this will be $60/week, however this number will constantly need to be adjusted as gas prices fluctuate pretty steadily. The tolls to/from is roughly $6 trip and is factored into the $60/week
$240

Lulu's Dojo costs - This is also a fixed number I spend $144 per month on her Dojo fee. Then there is the matter of new gear. Gear should be update annually an if I have the funds set aside I can purchase in Nov/Dec when good manufacturers have end of year sales. Items she'll need wrist wraps $15, shins $60, Head Gear $90, gloves $90 and mouth-guard $20. She doesn't use rib gear. Total Annual Gear: $275
$175

Fight Fees - There are fees and costs associated with her fights. WKA Fight Registration - $30/annually. Travel & Lodging
$110

Groceries - This is a category I have really had trouble with. I want to keep my costs down, but I also want to support local, ethical sources. This makes meat expensive. It also means that we don't have meat with every meal. Although I have gotten away from meatless meals and I'll need to ease back into that keeping in mind what the Boy and Lulu will and can eat. For NOW I am estimating I can feed the three of us for $125 per week. I will adjust that up if by tracking I find we are eating MORE per week than this amount, or once I have a hard number that I can live with start working at whittling it down.
$500

Hair Cuts, etc. - This is another category I never counted on. With short hair, like my current style I'll need to get regular cuts. I am looking for a stylist I like that I can afford (and/or one I can trade services with) but until then for myself, the Boy and Lulu I am setting a monthly amount of $60. Likely, this means only one of us can get a haircut per month and it may be a number I need to revisit. Things like color and prom styling will have to find another category.
$60

Holidays/Miscellaneous - This is a category I NEVER had in my previous budgets. But as discussed in a previous post I am planning on setting aside $20 per pay for Christmas. Since I am self-employed and my pay is not regular I have decided to make that $20/week and to "pay" myself first when I do have money coming in. But that doesn't allow for Birthdays or Holiday Meals so I am setting aside an additional $30/month for that.
$110

Entertainment - Movies, take-out, delivery, general fun
$50

Student Loans - I have quite a bit of student loan debt $30k, and I would like to start paying something (anything to it) so I am setting a minimum of $100 month.
$100

Credit Card Debt -
I also need to start paying something toward this as well so right now I am setting $100 per month and as my income becomes established and grows this category will grow as well. 
$100

Retirement - I will likely be cashing in my current retirement accounts (when the divorce is final). I know I'll lose 20% off the top AND may owe penalties on top of that on my taxes. This is a risk I am willing to take. I'll use those funds to pay off SOME of my credit card debt - I'd like to pay all but my $17k ESL debt using these funds, and then hold the rest as a cushion while I get my business up and running. I am giving myself a break until I am 40 (less than 2 years now) to start saving for retirement again. At which point I will contribute the maximum amount allowed annually to a retirement account (currently $5,500 which works out to be $460/month or $120/week).

Those are the numbers I can think of, anything you see that I am glaringly missing?

I mentioned in the last money matters post that I would be listing some items on a FB page. The pages starts items at $.25 and goes up in $.25 increments. As of writing this post I sold 3 items for $.25 each which give me $.75 to put toward debts. I know it doesn't seem like much, but it is three items out of my house and gone from my clutter and $.75 closer to ending my debt struggles. I plan to hold the cash until I have $25 and then make a $25 random debt payment to my highest interest debt (ESL). It might not look like much, but it is. 

Additionally, I received an offer to settle one of my credit cards for for about 40% of what is owed on it. I have the funds available so I am going to take that offer and get rid of my smallest debt in one fell swoop. I am hoping to receive a similar offer on my next smallest debt (owned by the same bank) and that I will be able to take advantage of that offer as well. Baby steps. I am not yet a Gazelle, but an infant learning to walk in the world of personal financial accountability. I am certain that I will stumble, and that I will even fall, but I know that I will learn and grow...

The BEST Christmas Ever!

Going into Christmas 2015 I felt like Faith Hill's song "Where Are You Christmas", but by the second verse of that song she has discovered her Christmas spirit. 

Where are you Christmas 

Why can't I find you 

Why have you gone away 

Where is the laughter 

You used to bring me 

Why can't I hear music play

My world is changing

I'm rearranging

Does that mean Christmas changes too

I was certain that if I could get the Tree....

Add the lights and decorations.....

Decorate the house......

Just enjoy the Christmas Spirit I could once again rekindle Christmas. 

Alas it seemed as if I was never going to find my Christmas spirit, and as the big DAY approached, I felt a familiar feeling. What exactly was that feeling?

I know it is February and few people are thinking about Christmas.  Christmas 2015 was a bit of a roller coaster for me. When I first left the X I was excited for the holidays, but for whatever reason by the time October rolled around I really wasn’t looking forward to any of the Holidays.

The kids had a fabulous Halloween (despite my not having much money to help  them with costumes and food).  Lu invited a group of her friends over to pass out candy. Both kids were super excited as this was the first year we expected trick or treators.  When the X and I purchased our house, I was super excited about that first Halloween. I bought a decent amount of candy and the X stayed home to pass it out while I took Lu to get her own candy. We did not have a single trick or treat visitor, it was disappointing.

Since moving into my apartment we have seen a number of kids of various ages in the neighborhood. So we expected we would have kids. 3 small bags of candy later we had a good amount of trick or treat visitors (and a hoodlum who smashed Sampson’s pumpkin). More important were the kids hanging out. Lu planned a fabulous spread, Becs came over to help prepare all the sweets and treats and then the rest of the gang showed up. The kids had a good time getting dressed up, passing out candy and playing cards against humanity.

On to Thanksgiving:

I am beginning to think Lu lives for Holiday meals. She enjoys planning them and puts considerable effort into planning the menu. She had been planning this Thanksgiving meal since January and it was one of her first questions when her Dad and I separated. “Would this affect Thanksgiving dinner?” I was determined not to let it. Dare I even say it would be the best Black Friday Thanksgiving EVER?!

I put a deposit down on a heritage turkey from one of our favorite farmers, Meant to be Meadows, and when time came to pay the balance and pick up the Turkey the Universe worked that out for me. I had been able to provide the ingredients for her to make the meal she planned, with some help from my Mom (Almond Flour and other Grain Free baking supplies), and a program funded by the Friends of the Public Market.  This program gifted me bonus dollars when I used my SNAP benefits at the Public Market.

Thanksgiving on Black Friday, and I was sick. It didn’t matter, Lu had her first run as a solo chef preparing a Thanksgiving meal and her timing was spot on. It was a tasty meal, so tasty no one had room for the desserts (which we enjoyed over the course of the next week).

Then it was time for the Christmas Tree. I just wasn’t feeling it. I didn’t want to drag the boxes down from the attic. If I just faked it, eventually I would find my Christmas spirit, right? Off we went to get our Christmas tree from the Boy Scouts. It was twice my budget but financially things were looking OK, and my parents found an old heavy tree stand they no longer used. Up went the tree. It was a beautiful tree. It sat lonely and plain for 2 weeks. Partially because we all wanted to be together to decorate it, and partially because I just wasn’t into it. I didn’t even put lights on until it was time to decorate.

I stuck some paper flowers a friend and local artist had made into the tree on a whim, but somehow it worked. This gave me the homemade heartfelt Christmas feeling I had been missing, and I plan on picking up a few more (about a dozen total of these flowers and some of her stitched birds as well) and maybe even trying my hand at this pin or this one, but despite the flowers and the tree I just wasn’t quite there.

The kids decorated the tree but the Angel and my stocking were still in the attic. 

It took a couple of days to get those items out, and still no Christmas spirit. I was starting to feel like the first verse of the Faith Hill song “Where Are You Christmas”.

Then everything in my financial world turned upside down. I have always wanted to do a truly homemade Christmas (and Christmas 2014 found me doing the most homemade gifts I had ever done), but I lacked confidence in my own DIY abilities. I scrambled for cash and sold some more of my belongings to come up with $100.  It was enough. I was able to purchase 2 large KirArts Monsters and 2 Nubbins. Christmas wouldn’t be the same in my house without KiraArts.

Even with having the gifts taken care of my SNAP benefits were nearly exhausted and I was worried about being able to make Christmas Breakfast and dinner on $45. Once again, the Universe (and maybe Sheila Kennedy) reminded me that I was supported and I found myself with a last minute holiday chair massage event, giving me the cash I needed to stuff the kids stockings. I kept pushing forward but I just didn’t feel like Christmas.

Lu adjusted her breakfast and dinner menus to fit what we had and what we could afford, and once again it worked out. (Even the week after Christmas with no SNAP benefits remaining and no new benefits coming in until 1/6/2016 worked out.) My parent brought veggies, fruit and cookies and we had a wonderful Christmas. My mother brought less for Christmas gifts than she has in the past and it seemed like she put more thought into the gifts she did purchase and pass on (I received a box of afghans, which I use all the time) all of her gifts were spot on. The kids were happy with their gifts and we enjoyed a quiet day with family.

A brand new stocking for Sampson a custom order from Erin Makes Stuff

I LOVE the gifts I received from my kids, a peacock mochi from Sampson, and a peacock inspired hair clip from Lu. I always tell my kids that the homemade, heartfelt gifts are the best and I truly mean it. 

As Christmas wound down I was finally found my Christmas spirit.

The X was never a big fan of Christmas, and I knew and understood his reasons and his feelings. Sometimes I felt like he was Grinching me, but the last few years we were together he really made an effort to make Christmas good for me and the kids. He downloaded a bunch of Christmas Music just for me. He would drag the Christmas Tree down (usually in time for my birthday) and even fluff up the branches. He would drag out the ornaments. He enjoyed Christmas with his family, but somehow I lost sight of that and I blamed him for my lack of Christmas spirit.

I was so focused on creating the fairytale for my kids that I became stressed out. Money was ALWAYS tight in our house, so I always had to wait for my Birthday money to purchase Christmas gifts (which made me always feel like I was under the gun, especially for the ones I had to ship downstate) and to purchase the fixings for the BIG meal. Instead of saying WE really couldn’t afford Prime Rib, I would use all my Birthday money to make Christmas happen and sometimes even the credit cards. Then I would resent the X for not chipping in, keep in mind I never asked him to chip in, I just expected him to see that I never spent my Birthday money on me and feel like he SHOULD contribute more.

The cause of my stress and unhappiness was solely myself. No matter what the year or circumstances I always made Christmas happen, but I put so much pressure on myself for it to be perfect I actually ruined it for everyone. The kids and the X could see and feel my stress but when they offered to help I would get defensive and angry and attack them for offering help.

So why am I thinking about Christmas now? I believe the key to not stressing is to have a plan. For me not to feel financially stressed about making Christmas happen is to spread it out over the year. To make a list of who I WANT to gift to, not those I feel obligated to gift to, but those I want to gift to and what I think they might like. For me this will be a paper list that I can keep in my coat pocket (I don’t always carry a purse). I'll pick up little things as I see them at craft shows, First Fridays, Second Saturdays and Brainery Bazaars throughout the year.  I'll also need to start DIYing some of my gifts with plenty of time to try again. Lastly, I am going to make an effort to take $20 out of every pay that I receive between now and Thanksgiving so when the BIG Holiday shows start happening I'll have some money to finish my shopping. 

I haven’t sent out Christmas cards since the kids were little, and I would like to start doing so again. My thought is if make 1-3 Christmas cards per week (I love to make cards and have plenty of supplies) and address the envelopes (while creating an updated address book for myself) it will be easier come Thanksgiving to write a brief personalized greeting in each one and mail them out. I will also be purchasing the stamps weekly to defray the costs (and yes I know this means they will not have Christmas/winter stamps on them and I am OK with that). 

If you want you’ll be able to keep up with my Christmas preparations on this blog (although I won’t share projects that I am working on for the kids, because you never know when Lu is going to come in and edit, tag, label posts or write one of her own). 

Who is with me? 

Wellness Wednesday

Since this blog was started with the premise of being a Wellness focused blog, I will try to make my Wednesday topics something that is easily identifiable as wellness. I’d like to start with addictions.

Addiction comes with a huge stigma. People think of drugs (street and prescription), alcohol, gambling, sex, even food. People often think of individuals who they wouldn’t want to sit next to on public transit, who steal, lie, and have ruined lives.

What about good addictions? Are there good addictions? Would it be good to be addicted to cleaning, to organizing, to working out, to baking? In my personal opinion an addiction is NEVER good. An addiction is something that you have to have, you have to do without regard for how it effects those around them.

That being said, most everyone I know has an addiction, whether they admit to it or not. Most people are addicted to electronics, social media or some type of food.

Personally, I’d like to deal with my sugar addiction. I know I am addicted because I think about sugar (candy) ALL the time. I have noticed that MOST candy these days does not taste the way I remember it (kind of like chasing that first drug high, it is never as good after the first time) and some candy even tastes like dish soap. Not only do I finish the container I have, I often purchase it again! I have also given in to the soda craze and often drink soda throughout the week. Not even good soda (like Birch Beer, Black Cherry Soda or Ginger Beer) but run of the mill big Cola company sodas.

So right here, right now I am going to deal with my sugar addiction. I have read about 21 day Sugar Detoxes, and essentially that is what I need. From now until Easter I am going to stay away from white sugar. When I say white sugar I mean cane/beet sugar, what most people associate as “sugar”. Right now I am not concerned with fructose (as found in my whole fruits and vegetables), maple sugar/syrup, coconut sugar or honey.

Why only to Easter? Because I believe lifestyle changes that work have to allow for life, celebrations and holidays. Come Easter I will do my usual Easter Basket shopping and enjoy my share of Easter candy. But at that point I will be just past 6 weeks without white sugar. This will allow me to decide if I really enjoy any of the Easter Candy or if I am better off without it.

One addiction at a time.

Time Management Tuesdays

I am sure you have heard the saying we all have the same 24 hours, it matters what you do with them. If you are like me you then start in on a litany of things that you have to get done in those 24 hours including sleep. I personally find it easier to make excuses than to make progress.

I realized on a recent Sunday (when I had no internet – read about that day here), that I am highly unproductive and I waste a LOT of time. There are reasons I waste time, but the reality is, if I want things to change then I have to become a master of my own time and prioritize according to what is important to me.

I have taken stock and realize that I waste time in the following ways:

Especially in the winter time, I sleep more than I NEED to. How do I know I sleep more than I need to? The answer is simple I am tired when I wake up. I know some people would say that waking up not feeling rested is probably a sign of not enough sleep, but the truth is that oversleeping can leave you just as drained as not getting enough sleep.

There are two reasons that I oversleep. The first is common in the winter, it is cold out and I would rather sleep than deal with the cold. Especially, in my current apartment, when I cannot get the heat above 62 degrees, even when running the furnace ALL DAY LONG.  I don’t mind a lower room temperature. I like sleeping in cooler temperatures; this was actually a subject over which the X and I fought regularly. I would prefer that the heat be 50 degrees at night for sleeping, but he thought that was too cold.  At any rate when the weather gets colder and the natural light becomes sparse it is human nature to want to sleep more. What I need to do instead is to put warm layers on (I have plenty of warm fuzzy socks and gloves) and start picking projects to work on.

The other reason I sleep as much as I do is often because I do not want to deal with the project or issue in front of me. Rather than risk failure (which I am often certain is the outcome) I would rather ignore it, tell myself I am tired and go to sleep. I need to get better at remembering that I only fail if I do not attempt the project. If I try and the outcome is not as planned or expected I can always try again or accept the outcome.

So conquering the sleep excuse I still have roughly 16 hours in my day. I do not like starting on projects at the end of my day. I feel like I am already emotionally, mentally and physically drained. The answer to this objection is to keep my evening activities to those humdrum daily activities that do not take creativity or real energy. I can always make sure to wash the dishes before I go to bed. I can always run the washing machine and hang the laundry before I go to bed. Then if I go to bed at a reasonable hour (say 2200) then I can wake up between 5 and 6 and feel well rested as well as have time to start on small projects.

I need to start breaking projects down into smaller tasks. With the exception of Saturday afternoons and Sundays I rarely have large blocks of time (that I don’t feel drained and exhausted for). The solution to this obstacle is to break projects into smaller tasks. I need to hang curtain rods in 4 different rooms. I can however break that down to hanging 1 set of curtain rods at a time.

Not having the energy to complete tasks at hand is another big obstacle for me. I know that when I eat poorly, I feel tired, bloated and sluggish. This means to be more productive and to make more out of the time I do have, I am going to need to eat better.

The next biggest time waster for me is entertainment. Now I haven’t had cable or satellite for many, many moons (more than 10). I have had Netflix for almost 2 years now and between Netflix and random internet time wasters (ahem Facebook) I lose quite a bit of time. Additionally, I notice that I am more tired when I spend large amounts of time staring at a screen.

The solution is to limit my screen time, AND to make screen time contingent on completing tasks.

This week I am going to come up with my daily task list for the week. This will be the things that regularly need to get done. Getting into the routine with regular tasks (aka chores) is how I am going to master time management this week.

Monday Money Matters

Three years ago I started another blog, a blog which focused on my journey to be greener and to get out of debt. Back then I was convinced that I could fix my marriage and my life if I could get out of debt. I would make small progress on my credit card debt and then I would back slide. Well now I know that I have to deal with my financial situation. I cannot ignore it or hope that my X will wake up one day and take care of it. It is my mess to clean up. Why does that matter to a wellness focused blog?

Finances cause many people stress, having a plan for financial freedom is good for the body and the soul. So that is what I will focus on. Something I noticed 3 years ago is that there were not a lot of good tips for people in my situation. All the blogs I could find about debt reduction had a few things in common:

They lived an exorbitant lifetsyle;
They had expensive possessions to sell;
They had leases on top dollar vehicles; and
They had places to cut in their budget.

That is not to say there are not steps I can take to become more fiscally responsible (stopping running to the Family Dollar or McDonald's when I am tired and don't feel like cooking) but I don't have the leeway that others might have. So where does a girl start?

I am going to start by getting rid of the clutter. I will list the items that do not serve me on Facebook sales Group Pages and make what I can, but I don't have top dollar items left. The stuff that doesn't sell will go on a Facebook Free Page because I need to learn to let go of what doesn't serve me.

Lastly, every Monday I will be picking a Pinterest Pin about Money Savings or Money Making Options and give my honest opinion and/or my trial of their strategies.

This weeks Pin is How We Dumped $18,000 of Debt in One Day

I've seen this strategy touted in a number of blogs when I was looking for ways to pay down my debt. I applaud this strategy. If you have a high dollar lease and YOU CAN get out of it and into a paid for vehicle, then go for it. Likewise if you have a high value car (even if it is paid for) and you can sell it and get into a more affordable paid for car and then use the difference to pay down debt? Go for it. If you have an extra car (yes I saw that a number of times in blogs as well) sell it and apply the money to your debt.

But if you are like me and you don't even have a car, then this isn't a viable option. That is the problem I found with most blogs and articles about getting out of debt. They are based on the premise that one lives beyond their means in an extravagant manner. Was I living outside my means? Certainly, if I wasn't I wouldn't have nearly $30k in defaulted consumer debt. Did I always purchase shoes, clothes or things the kids needed? NO.

A good deal of the funds were to give the things I couldn't afford. Clothing that they wanted, not just clothing they needed.

I tried unsuccessfully to start businesses, scrapbooking, plastic ware, silver jewelry, costume jewelry, essential oils. In the end all I have was more debt and no new income. I am not saying there isn't money in the direct sales industry, I know women that were pulling in money, it just wasn't for me.

Needless to say I won't be selling my high dollar vehicle to slash my debt. But I will be selling:
3 pair of heels I never wear
2 picture frames
Silk Flowers from my wedding
Fairy Wall Stickers
Flea Medicine for dogs
Tie Dye Kit
Unopened Stationary

I'll let you know next week how that turns out AND check in on another Money/Debt pin from Pinterest.

A Day In My Life

I woke up this morning at 7:10, after roughly 11 hours of fitful frozen sleep.  I went to bed early last night feeling exhausted, frozen and board.  I tried reading, snuggled under several blankets, but I kept running into the issue of my hands freezing. I tried to hold my book with gloves and it just wasn’t working. Feeling somewhat defeated I turned off the furnace (or so I thought) and headed to bed.

Why would anyone turn the furnace off at night? Well the furnace in my apartment is old, inefficient and loud. I find it hard to sleep when the furnace kicks on every 30 minutes or so, and loudly blows warm, cool or cold air into the room I am sleeping in. You see my furnace lacks an air filter, and does not run properly. If left on for extended periods of time (you know like to keep the house above 30 in the winter) it blows cold air. I have asked my landlord to look at it, he and Steve came over and looked at it. Determined it did not have a filter and that the filter is no longer made…. they cleaned it out and that was that. I have informed my landlord that it still doesn’t work and I NEED the filter. Every time I run the furnace I get stuffed up. I have also informed him, no matter how high I set the thermostat or run the furnace the apartment does not get above 60 degrees. Now I grew up with a wood stove so I actually prefer to turn the heat off at night and I wouldn’t mind 60 degrees IF I could keep it at that temperature during the day. The problem is that I cannot run the furnace all day long, and if I do it blows cold air.I digress… 

Last night when I went to bed I thought I turned the thermostat (old slide style) off, but it was just slightly off the far left mark. 

This resulted in the heater kicking on regularly throughout the night and my being too cold (and lazy) to get up and turn it all the way off.  The house is typically 45-50 degrees when I get up in the morning, it was at 45 this morning. I turned on the computer to see if I had internet and alas still no internet. I sent a text message to my landlord, and am waiting for a response. The internet is shared between mine and the other apartment so it is in the landlord's name. Without internet I had to find something to do.

Staring me in the face was a chair full of laundry. I folded the laundry, and then miracle of all miracles, I  actually put my laundry and the linens away. I leave the kids’ stuff for them to put away, but we need to come up with a solution for Sampson’s clothing (he doesn’t have a dresser or the room for one, and the closet is useless). After finishing the laundry I was left with a bunch of unmatched socks (typical).

I grabbed the baskets from Sampson’s closet to sort those out as well. Then I was distracted (maybe I have ADHD) and decided to do something about the windows (or maybe it was because I was freezing).

A few blogs back, I posted about solutions for cold windows and mentioned wanting to put cardboard in the windows (a kind of damper for the drafty windows). That made me wonder if I had enough cardboard. As has been the case when I leave it up to the Universe and trust that I have what I need, I found myself with a perfect cardboard box.

Cut into two pieces there was enough cardboard for the base of the two living room windows.

I laid one piece out on the floor and used red duct tape (it is what I had) 

and then took a peek at my gift wrap.

I could just cover with newspaper but I think newspaper or just plain cardboard might make the apartment look vacant and invite trouble. Besides I don’t want to look at plain cardboard or newspaper. I realized I needed to sweep the floor (get rid of all the little bits that would get stuck to or damage the paper) and just like that I remembered I needed to put the chili on.

I have been planning on making chili since last week Sunday. I picked up a small pork roast from Aldi’s (a decent place to get groceries when one is on SNAP and broke, like myself), organic canned tomatoes, organic black beans, and organic kidney beans. After pulling out and wiping down the crockpot, I assembled my ingredients. 

(Yes I have a white bowl instead of the black bowl.)

At one point I had two crock pot inserts and lids. Someone posted a free insert with lid as her heating unit no longer worked. I had to clean out the insert which had burnt on apples in it, but it was worth it to have two inserts for my crockpot. At some point the X decided rather than clean out the bowl he would just throw it and its lid (the better of the two lids) away. Then after moving into this apartment my bowl cracked. I didn’t have, nor desired to spend, the money for a new unit so I figured I would find another bowl at a garage sale. As luck would have it my friend Dawn invited me to one of the late days of the Ronald McDonald House Household Sale. I was not impressed, but I did find the white bowl. I wasn’t sure if it would fit or work, but it did. Once again I put out the intention to the Universe to replace my bowl at a garage sale and a replacement and garage sale found me.)

In the bottom of my crock pot I put one of the cans of crushed organic tomatoes. Over the top of that I added some cooked spicy Italian sausage (left over from when we made pizza fries) and the pork roast. 

I’ll need to pull the roast out when it is done, shred it and return it to the dish. On top of that I sprinkled a decent amount of turmeric, cumin, chipolte powder and Tastefully Simple’s Onion Onion (which has garlic in it).

Two cans of organic black beans and two cans of organic kidney beans (both drained and rinsed) and a second can of crushed organic tomatoes and this dish was ready to cook all day long on low. 

I have a third can of crushed organic tomatoes, and left over frozen pumpkin puree. Once the dish has cooked and I shred the pork I’ll add the additional tomato sauce and pumpkin puree. I use pumpkin because it thickens the sauce (just like tomato paste) and has some great vitamins. I have used canned puree but this is from the organic pie pumpkins I was able to get at the Public Market back around Thanksgiving.

This is my evil non-functioning can opener. It doesn't turn so one has to manually crunch the lid all the way around. Don't get me wrong I got what I paid for, since I picked this up on the cheap at either Big Lots or Family Dollar. Universe I am now on the look out for a GOOD can opener.

The only thing that would make this dish better would be if I ethically sourced my pork and sausage.

Meant to Be Meadows and Seven Bridges Farms are my go to sources for local, ethical and sustainable meat and eggs. Unfortunately, Meant to Be Meadows is a small business that does not take SNAP (to much red tape and cost for limited return) and only recently has Seven Bridges added SNAP to its payments.  Even with SNAP being accepted I only have a small amount to spend to feed me and the kids for the whole month (less than $375/month) and buying my meats from M2BM and 7BF is not always possible. I do always notice the difference when I don’t have local, ethical, sustainable meats. Maybe it is in my head, maybe it is not.

Then I decided to clean up the kitchen. 

As you can see dishes don’t get done regularly in my house. Pretty much all three of us just use the dishes until there are NONE left. 

I put all the spices left on the counter earlier in the week back in a cupboard (at some point I’ll tackle the cupboard organization). And then I remembered that I had laundry in the washing machine.

So off to the basement to hang it up.

When I left my house I did not have the money for a washing machine and since the X had recently purchased the new washing machine I didn’t feel it was right for me to take it. Instead I found a really old one for $50 on a Facebook Sale page. I purchased it not knowing if it was going to work or not, the owner promised me it worked when they put it in the garage 6 months before. I put it in my storage unit (for 2 months and then it sat in the basement for 3ish months while I waited for the landlord to install a drain sink and the plumbing to hook of my washing machine). I don’t have the funds for a dryer and while I do plan to eventually purchase a dryer I like to hang clothing. Even with a top of the line dryer at the old house I hung 90% of my laundry, using the dryer for linens only.  Another load into the washing machine (with some washing soda and borax) and back to the kitchen.

I always intend to make my own laundry detergent using the Dugger’s recipe floating around the internet. Some women I knew had made the recipe and said it worked well. I purchased Borax, Fels Naptha and Washing Soda. I never got around to grating the Fels Naptha. One day I read the label and found out Fels Naptha had perfume in it and decided I wanted to make mine with Kirk’s Castile Bar Soap. Then I began to wonder if I could use liquid castile soap in place of the grated soap. I never got around to trying it out (unless you count just adding a capful of Dr. Bronner’s Baby Mild liquid Castile soap to 1 Tbps or Borax and 1 Tbps of Washing Soda when my washer was finally up and running, and it worked as good as when I was using laundry soap). Right now I don’t have the funds to buy laundry soap so I am just using up the Borax and Washing Soda, which works great on cat urine (yep I have a cat who likes to pee on laundry when it is left on the floor). I am sure it would be more frugal to mix even parts Borax and Washing Soda and then use a measuring tool to use the same amount each time (and I plan to the next time I pick up the two products).

Returning to the kitchen I proceeded to empty the sink and “sort” the dishes.

In the bottom of the sink I found a dish towel (from when Sampson burned his fingers on our Roaster Pan making Pizza Fries) and sponge type wash cloth.

I wrung both out and added them to the already started washing machine. At this point I realized I could not wash the dishes. My water heater is OLD and I don’t have enough pressure to run two sinks at the same time, let alone a washer and do dishes. Besides there wouldn’t be enough hot water.  So instead I picked up the cardboard pieces and put them in the windows. Might as well as block some of that cold air while I am procrastinating on finishing the project I started.

FYI, two weeks later as I am finally getting this post up on the blog I still have not covered the cardoard in the windows...

Sitting down to the computer to check internet (nope still not there) and type this post in Word to be transferred later to Blogger (2 weeks later).

Now I can finish the unsorted laundry from Sampson’s closet (and then maybe some dishes)…

Instead of just sorting laundry I turned on the thermostat (I realized my hands were cold again),

got myself some water,

put away the hairdryer that Lu left out on the rocking chair and the newspaper from I don’t know when……

Folded the laundry in the baskets and was left with a huge pile of socks.

I HATE sorting socks. I know that Sampson doesn’t care (never has) if his socks match but I’d like to get rid of the lonely unmatched socks. I have been slowly turning old worn out socks with holes in them into rags for cleaning.

Back into the kitchen where decided I’d rather sweep the living room floor.

I moved the furniture on the East side of the room to do a thorough sweep (but not the furniture on the West side of the room, there is a massage chair, some boxes, crap to put away, and the broken chair with the socks on it)…… After sweeping Ruffalo needed a walk, and when we got back he was wet and needed drying off. Time for lunch for him and some grapes for myself I decided to update this entry. So here I sit enjoying my grapes but knowing that I should make a real lunch and that I’ll have to do dishes in order to make dinner. 

Lu is at her Dad’s and Sampson called to say he was staying overnight as well I could just have another bowl of cereal and NOT do the dishes, but then the dishes will be here tomorrow and I certainly won’t want to wash them after 5 hours at the tax office. So ultimately I know before I go to bed I’ll need to wash the dishes.

This constant sneezing and runny nose from the furnace is really starting to get on my nerves.  So here I sit typing and putting off completing any number of projects…..

¾ of the dishes done later, my water was cold and the soap was gone. 

 I typically use the dead dishwater to rinse out the sticky recyclables and you can see there were a number of cans and bottles left with the dirty dishes.

The only cans that should have been in there were the cat food cans (3) and the bean cans (4) but for some reason there was also a tuna can, a jar from maraschino cherries, and an apple juice container.

I still have not had lunch, and my friend Dawn should be coming over later. I think I am going to hang up the laundry and then try not to fall asleep from boredom while I wait for Dawn.

I did manage to hang up the laundry from the wash, and I opted to not start another load (I could run a partial load, but I don’t have any more clothespins). Then I sorted SOME of the socks, spent time with Ruffalo and ate a brownie covered in peanut butter. I have resigned myself to chili for dinner (but Dawn isn’t here yet so we might decide to go out to Applebees since it is dinner time). I do want to try to wash the last of the dishes before I go to bed though.

Dawn did finally make it over and she brought me these lovely gifts. What a wonderful friend she is!

I thought about starting to organize Sampson’s room, but I think that should wait till he is around to have a say. Also I am pretty much out of energy.

So that is a typical day in my life, except I forgot to mention one thing, it was my ONE day off per week. I am working 6 days a week until the end of Tax season as a means to an end. The X does not contribute to taking care of the children. In his opinion we have equal shared custody and equal shared financial responsibility. Maybe I would agree if Sampson was visiting his Dad as frequently as Lu, but even with that I still have to pay for everything, and all he is paying for is food for his house. According to him I am the “moneyed” spouse. While I certainly don’t have any money (I have past due rent for December and January and am only still in my apartment because my Landlord is a saint when it comes to the back rent), but the X is right, I am the moneyed spouse because like always I will do whatever it takes to give my kids what they need and some of what they want.

I should thank my X, after all he has set me on the path that will lead me to success….

 

And I did have chili for dinner and it was super tasty!